Tokyo Disneyland’s Buzz Lightyear has a friend in Woody, and also a friend in his crotch

SoraNews24

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There are only so many hours in a day, which means all the time you devote to listening to Japanese girls’ rock bands or learning a half-dozen ways to says “breasts” in Japanese means less time for soaking up mainstream American pop culture. As a result, I’ve got some pretty big gaps in my Hollywood movie-watching history, but at least I know their basic plots because they’ve been talked about and referenced elsewhere so much.

For example, I know Titanic is about an elderly woman fondly remembering some dude she hooked up with on a cruise 70 years ago, who was apparently so good in the sack that she has no time on her deathbed to remember her children or the man who fathered them. Forest Gump is about remarkably patient bus travelers who are willing to listen to the life story a complete stranger because of his vague promises…

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